I Told You So

Steve is on the left, Ed in the blue shirt and Clif in the yellow.

All smiles. They actually admitted to enjoying it.

Of all the titles I could have come up with for this post, this one seemed most appropriate. Early on in my child-rearing years, I discovered the joys of pedicures. Every now and then, I'll even splurge and get a manicure to go with it, but pedicures are figured into the budget every month. Every now and then, I'll invite DH to go with me because I know once he steps into the salon, he'll be hooked. But he always comes up with excuses and has, for the better part of 13 years, won.

That all changed last weekend when we went on a couples night out. You have heard me write about my friend Julie (who has twins and a 5 year old) and Lynne (and babies make six). When Julie and I took Lynne out for her birthday, we started talking about how we all liked pedicures (that's what we got Lynne for her birthday, by the way) and how our husbands would enjoy them if we could only get them in the chair. Well, that was all it took. We planned the salon, the date, the way we were going to get them out of the house, even lined up a few babysitters. The hardest part for me: keeping it a secret until the big day.

I haven't been blogging during the Christmas season, so I guess you'll have to come back...but I absolutely, beyond the shadow of a doubt, hate surprises. In fact, I loathe surprises. I even go buy all of my own Christmas presents, wrap them up, and put them under the tree because I can't stand to be surprised...yes, I'm a control freak. So in order not to tell Dear Husband, I had to totally block it all out of my mind. Then, I stayed busy all day Saturday so I wouldn't spoil it. We arrived right on time to pick up Lynne and Clif...who had decided he'd rather eat at a different resturant for dinner. Nope, notta, sorry...gotta go to Sydney's (it is, after all, strategically placed right next to the nail salon). Finally, it was time to reveal our secret (yes, the one I actually kept for a WHOLE. ENTIRE. MONTH thankyouverymuch!

The funny party was watching their faces and them realizing that yes, we were serious, and yes, they really did have reservations in seats right beside each other, and no, we weren't having our nails done, we were only watching. If one would have walked away, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum would have followed. But noone wanted to be the first to walk...so in they go. The rest is history.

But I won because Steve (and Ed and Clif) admitted that yes, he did enjoy it and yes, his feet feel much better and yes, he will be back. For someone who routinely works 60-80 hours a week, personally I don't see how he's lasted this long without one. I do, after all, only look out for his best intersts : )

You Might Be a Redneck if...

you owe the dump $2.25. Jeff Foxworthy would be proud to tell this story. Unfortunately, it's mine and it's true. Yesterday was a hectic day in my house. Oldest Child had to be at a "fall festival" (in 100 degree heat...yeah, right!) to dance, then work till 3:00, then DH and I were going on a couples night out with our two couples friends (another post for another night...have to wait for the pictures...) and Youngest Child was spending the night across the street...whew!. So while I'm walking around the fall festival with Youngest Child, DH calls to ask if I'll go with The Dude to take the trailer, filled with various and asundry junk to the dump. Of course I can fit that into my schedule today...afterall, it's only been sitting loaded on the trailer for, oh, over a MONTH now...of course I'll ride with The Dude to the dump. TODAY.

Let me just say here and now if I ever get purse snatched, the robber will get away with about $1.22 because I don't carry cash. During the week, we never go anywhere; on the weekend, I've got the ATM card to take care of everything, so who needs cash?? So as we are about to set out for the dump, I go to what's left of the cash from the carnival...$3. I go raid DH's wallet...gee... another $3...wow!...I'm up to a whoppin' $6. Still not sure that's enough to cover the cost of what we're dropping off, I ask The Dude who is single and has no cares in the world if he has any cash I can borrow until I can go uptown to the bank...you guessed it...$3. Now seein' as how I'm fitting this trip into my already crammed calendar, our bank is not in the same direction as the dump, so I really don't want to take the time to go all the way to the bank, come all the way back by the house, and then head to the dump. So all together, I'm heading to the dump with a grand total of $9.00.

As we set out, I'm trying my best to remember exactly where said dump is...I remember going there awhile back; I was driving and my neighbor was telling me "turn here", "turn there" until we were there. All I remember about the drive is that we turn right by a funeral home and that road dead-ends into the dump. OK...we're in business now. So we finally see the funeral home, we turn and low and behold, we dead end right into the dump. Turns out, the dump is about 1/2 block from where The Dude is now gainfully employed. We drive onto the scale, the Nice Lady hands us our blue card that looks kinda like the card you put in your windshield when you're picking up from carpool lanes...we go drop off our precious materials ('scuse me, I mean junk)...and we drive back around to Nice Lady so she can weigh our truck once it's empty and we can pay for the privledge of using the dump. So we get to the window and give her our carpool card, and she says, in her very southern accent, "That'll be $11.25." I look at The Dude; The Dude looks at me. I look down in the dark crevices of my purse, he digs through his pockets...I recount our nine one dollar bills (and again, come up with NINE)...The Dude asks Nice Lady if they take credit or debit cards. Of course not, that would be too simple...who goes to the dump and whips out the Gold American Express?? Still smiling, Nice Lady says, "How much ya'll have?" The Dude says "nine". Nice Lady says, "Oh, just give me that, that'll do...just remember to next time you're here to add it onto your bill". But of course, Nice Lady, absolutely, anything you say...thank you so much for giving us credit at the dump. And you can bet your bottom dollar, being the honest, down-home person I am...next time I take a load of valuables to the dump, I'll be armed with cash and will remember to tell Nice Lady to add $2.25 to my bill.

The Times, They Are A-Changin'

Oh, yes, they are...but not enough for me to have another baby. It seems like only yesterday we were bringing Oldest Child and Youngest Child home from the hospital and buying all the new, handy gadgets that came along with newborn/toddler/small children. Because far be it from me to short-change my children in any way. But in the big scheme of life, TEN years is a lot of baby inventions. I've only been over here for less than twenty-four hours, and I've already noticed so much that my kids didn't have...not because they were deprived, but because it didn't exist, or it was too new and too expensive to buy.

Case in point, these babies have a video monitor in their room that I can use for my private detective agency when I retire. It swivels, it rotates, it moves all around...all with the touch of a button...and the babies don't even notice it's there. Yes, they had video monitors way back when, but they were gianormous and had a price tag to prove it.

Also, the sippy-cups are so new and improved that they have more than one piece to the lid and this slides into that and this locks here and you slide it there, and PRESTO, you have a leak-proof sippy-cup. Only problem is, you have to know what slides where and what locks to what in order to make it leak-proof. Probably a good thing Lynne still has some time left on her carpet cleaning warranty.

And the goodies that come in "bite size, easy to pick up pieces"...if all of this had been around way back when, my girls would be healthy eaters, not junk-food junkies. Bite size this, and finger size that, and steam-while-in-the-bag veggies...who'd-a-thunk??

Where on earth was On Demand when my girls were little and all I could amuse them with after hours was Sesame Street videos. Now, all you have to do is push a couple of buttons (have to ask Oldest Child because I'm still technogically challenged...) and you can have 24-hour Tom and Jerry cartoons. Your child addicted to Dora, click the button and you can finally get a 5-minute reprive...ANYTIME OF THE DAY you want it. Dora not scheduled to come on, click the button and there she is. It's amazing, I tell you. Not, however, amazing enough to make me want to go back and start over at square one, but amazing, nonetheless.

And I thought the diaper Genie and heated wipes were up and coming. I'll stick to my memories, come over here for a sippy-cup lesson, and stay on the count down until the Empty Nesting begins, thank you very much !

DON'T LEAVE ME WITH THE BABIES!!

If you go over to Lynne's blog (and babies make six) will probably find some happy, cheery, jumping for joy mom singing Leaving on a Jet Plane, because she is off to Las Vegas for a much-needed weekend of rest and relaxation.

I, on the otherhand, will be greeted by this when I arrive at her house for the weekend.



Missing from the picture is their three-year-old "big" brother, Austin. Stay tuned this weekend for updates, SOS messages, or pictures of Austin taking care of the triple threat because I couldn't handle it...just kidding, Lynne...go, enjoy your trip, sleep till your heart's content, order room service just because you can, request dinner seating AWAY from all parents will children under 18 because this is your weekend to do whatever you want, whenever you want. Enjoy!

Never Ask, "How Bad Can It Be?"...

...because you may just find out the answer to that question. I haven't mentioned before that Oldest Child is on her middle school dance team. Except in the Alumni News meme of the last post. Perhaps I haven't mentioned that fact because I was hoping if I kept my head buried in the sand or put on my rose-colored glasses then it would just go away. If you have read the meme, then you know that Oldest Child can accomplish anything she sets her mind to. This will serve her well once she is out of the house and on her own. While she is living under our roof, however, it causes much strife and many conflicts. This spring, she decided she wanted to try out for the dance team. She has always been a swimmer; swimming since she was in first grade with quite a few first place ribbons to show for her efforts. But the older she got, the more she wanted to spread her wings and try other "sports". First of all, when I said, "If it's OK with Dad, then it's OK with me," never dreaming in a million years her dad would say yes. Silly, silly me.

So, OK, now I have to hope against all hope that there are, oh, 3 or 4 or 15 girls trying out who are better than Oldest Child. My obligation was fulfilled, I said she could try out, she didn't make the team, keep on swimming, sweetie, keep on swimming. Well, after I watched her after ONE practice and seeing the routine ONCE, I knew that this wouldn't work either. Especially when I found out she only had to beat out HALF of those trying out, because there were only 30 vieing or 15 positions. It was then that I realized swimming would be put on hold for awhile because we were trying dance team. I could hardly contain my excitement when she found out she won.

Now that school is in full swing and she has dance practice on Tuesday and Thursday, and when you're 13 and you're choosing captains for the dance team on the first practice, you can only hope to imagine all the drama when THE FIRST PRACTICE OF THE SEASON, THE ONE WHERE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE CAPTAINS WAS CANCELLED!!!!!!!! (The dear, sweet sponsors, who just happen to be teachers at the middle school had a meeting...go figure!) So the choosing of the captains had to be postponed until Thursday; hate it when that happens. So we come home on Thursday and she tells me who the captain of the majorettes (who also practice with the dancers) was and she told me the name of a captain of the dance team. I was just getting ready to give her my, "You did you best, you will still be a good dancer" spill, when she told me that there were co-captains for the dance team and she was the other captain!!
And joy shown round about the earth.

I should have thought back to all Oldest Child has accomplished in her mere 13 years: took the training wheels off of her bicycle when she was four because her little boyfriend didn't have training wheels so she didn't need training wheels either. One of the youngest members of the swim team. The unicycle incident. I don't even watch her on the trampoline because I would hate to have a heart attack at my young age...but if the cheerleaders can do it, so can she. She was voted President of her youth group at church because she decided she wanted to, so that's what she did. If the trend continues, I'm thinking that perhaps a lawyer or doctor could come into the family and she could be rich and buy her mama a beach house because her mama was the one who carried her to and fro all the practices for all the teams she is on.

At this rate, I can hardly wait for high school : (

Alumni News (You Choose)

I have been challenged by BooMama with an Alumni Newsletter meme...and far be it from me to back down from a challenge. If you have yet to read BooMama's newsletter, stop right now and go here. If you've never read BooMama, shame on you. When you go visit, stay for awhile and visit. I promise you will be rolling in the floor before you leave. My good friend at And Babies Make Six and I have been known to call each other (1) to discuss the latest BooMama blog or (2) to make sure the other takes time to read it today because you really do need a good laugh and BooMama has provided it for us...but I digress. The challenge is to write an alumni newsletter article about yourself in the perky, show-off-y tone that always gets published and leaves you walking away shaking your head because you know in your heart of hearts that noone's life can be that perfect. The second "article" is much, much closer to the truth. So here goes. Consider yourself tagged (yes, especially you, Lynne), drop me a note so I can go check it out.

Article 1: Fabthemayor and Dear Husband recently celebrated fifteen years of marital bliss this past April. In those fifteen years, they have raised two amazing children. Oldest Child is 13, in the 8th grade at the local middle school where she is a member of the dance team. She loves to show off her school spirit and the dance team is such a creative way to do so. Youngest Child is 10 and in the fifth grade. She enjoys the outdoors, reading, and spending time with family. The girls are the highlight of her day and she enjoys each of them for her own unique qualities.

F has lived in the Atlanta area since relocating to Georgia upon completion of her Bachelor's degree. She had the priviledge of staying home with her daughters during the formative years. She has since re-entered the workforce as a teacher in an area public school. She enjoys the daily challenges this career brings as well as the rewards of each of her students.

Together, the family enjoys camping, NASCAR races, vacations at the beach and weekend get-aways to the mountains. If you ever find yourself in the Atlanta area, stop by, have some sweet tea, and chat awhile.

Article 2: Fabthemayor and DH just celebrated fifteen of marriage; she must have married when she was but a mere babe. While some days she would like to think she brought someone else's daughter home from the hospital that fateful day in 1994, Oldest Child is too much like her mama to be a case of "switched at birth". From her sassy manurisms to her whiny voice, to her rolly eyes and huffy breaths, Oldest Child is, to a "T", Fabthemayor's child. At this point in her life, F is actively seeking a circus that needs a good unicycle rider, because Oldest Child can accomplish anything she sets her mind to (including, but not limited to, learning how to ride a unicycle even though we don't have a stitch of pavement anywhere on our property). Determination will take Oldest Child far in life...if, in fact, she makes it past...oh, 13.

Youngest Child is much quieter and shy-er than Oldest Child. She is sitting in the background learning from her sister's mistakes. (OC often refers to YC as the suck-up). Youngest Child would be content to stay home. in her pajamas. all day. every day. period, end of discussion. Youngest Child keeps Fabthemayor hopping because she is the absolute opposite of her sister. On the occasion that Youngest Child chooses to go outside, give her a sandbox or a pile of dirt, water her occasionaly, and feed her three times a day, and she is 100% satisfied. Youngest Child will be a vetrinarian when she grown up because she wants to rescue every stray animal that comes onto our property and thought DH was cruel because he drew the line with the newest cat that arrived. He was all for us keeping the cat, feeding the cat, etc. He only had two ground rules...the new cat lives OUTSIDE and we cannot, at all, period, under any circumstances, take New Cat to the vet...four animals at once is more than plenty.

Fabthemayor has heard others referring to "Empty Nest" syndrome, and can hardly wait to experience this. Her plans for the future include every possible Bike Week across the country as well as being the camp ground host for various camp grounds across the United States. If you are ever in the Atlanta area, call or come by...I'll leave the girls with DH and we'll go get something to eat and talk about everyone else (I mean catch up).

Free is Good

DH and I have opposite views of "free stuff". His motto, "If it's free, take very little". My motto, "Free is good". Case in point, if you haven't heard the new Monk and Neagle CD, stop reading this post right now and go click on their button. I was one of the lucky ones who submitted my information in time to get a free copy sent to me...no strings attached. Listen and enjoy and tell others about it. How simple is that?? Only the CD came a few weeks ago and got put in a "pile" in my kitchen. I was cleaning off the counter today and found it, put it in my CD player in the kitchen, and haven't stopped listening to it since. I have two favorite songs on it - the title song is amazing. But being the mother of a soldier, The Soldier Song spoke to my heart.

So listen from the button while you're blogging, and next time you visit your local Christian bookstore, treat yourself to this wonderful CD. Thanks to BooMama for hooking me up, and thanks to Brian at Monk and Neagle for proving that yes, once again, free is good : )

Kids are so Literal

subtitled, "I Saved a Frog Today". I know you are waiting with baited breath to see where I'm going with this one. But I didn't quite realize until this afternoon, outside on the playground, with a new group of students who have only been fourth graders for...oh...three days now. Before that, they were mere third graders, just how literal kids can be. Being in the classroom, I always have to be on my toes; it's never the same, the teacher beside me today had to administer the Heimlich maneuver because a student was choked (yes, turning blue, eyes rolling in the back of his head choking). I merely saved a frog.

Remember when we were little and we were fascinated when we found a live animal on the playground?? And it was the best thing in the whole world?? A little girl found a frog today. A frog who was no bigger around than a quarter....who I'm sure was petrified by his new-found friend. Of course, she had to show her new pet off to her friends. She even let a couple of the friends hold her new treasure. But once I noticed what the commotion was about, I went over and decided that our new little friend would be off if we set him free to enjoy his life as he knew it before his instant stardom. So very calmly, I told her to put the frog down and set him free...thinking she would put him back where she found him, or up near the school building in the grass, or over in the shade under a tree. Silly, silly teacher.

She dropped him...right there. in the middle of the playground. in the woodchips, with five or 3,245 fourth graders standing around ready to pick up the frog and show off their new treasure. Whatever was I thinking?? Luckily I think pretty quickly on my feet. Our future veterinarian picked up her friend from the woodchips and together we carried him off of the playground, over to some big rocks, behind the gym, in the shade...where he actually stands a chance against the fourth graders.

My Very First Meme E-V-I-R

Seein as how I'm new to bloggin and I'm really supposed to be organizing registration papers and other fun stuff like that, I found a neat meme over at Big Mama's and decided that since ya'll don't know a lot about me, what better meme to start with than one about my high school days. Sit back, relax, enjoy...don't tell me how hard you laugh, though...
1. Who was your best friend? Had to be Debbie, Anne, and Leslie. Leslie, Debbie and I all worked at the local Dairy Queen together, so we knew each other pretty well. Anne was in most of my business classes and we eventually went to college together. Still am very good friends with Debbie and Anne.
2. Did you play any sports? No. Seein' as how I'm not sure who in my home state reads this blog (or who will read it in the future), I'll just leave it at no; no explanation other than to say that my girls will be able to participate in whatever sports, after-school activities, etc., that they want to, and I will take them to and pick them up from said activities because it will never in a million years be too far for me to drive.
3. What kind of car did you drive? The good ol' trusty family Ford LTD.
4. It's Friday night. Where were you? Working at the Dairy Queen. My boss thought it was because I was trustworthy; little did he know it was because I didn't have a life.
5. Were you a party animal? No, actually I never went to any parties when I was in high school (yes, that's the honest truth...and I never tasted alcohol until after I graduated...)
6. Were you considered a flirt? Absolutely not. I was the one who went around and fixed everyone else's relationships. I was always the one people confided in.
7. Were you in the band, orchestra or choir? No; refer to answer #2.
8. Were you a nerd? No, but I sure was friends with enough of them.
9. Were you ever suspended or expelled? No, I was one of the good ones.
10. Can you sing the fight song? Absolutely. I may not have been at any of the football or basketball games, but I was working my little fingers to the bone at the DQ, listening to the games on the radio, singing along as the band played.
11. Who was your favorite teacher? I have two. Mr. Boone who taught English Lit. He instilled my love of reading, poetry, and old movies. I cannot watch Audrey Hepburn without thinking of him. And Miss McClung who was my homeroom teacher. She showed me her love and understanding not only as her student, but also her friend.
12. Who was your school mascot? The Cavalier. And not that you asked, but we were blue and gold.
13. Did you go to the prom? Yes, my senior year. Went with Steve because he was one of the few guys on the "approved" list I was allowed to choose from.
14. If you could go back, would you? Not just no, but *%*&^*&^% NO!
15. What do you remember most about graduation? We were standing outside the gym getting ready to march in. A girl named Charlotte was standing behind me and she had tears in her eyes as she said, "Do you realize this is the last time we will ever be together like this?" Then I lost it.
16. Where were you on Senior Skip Day? I was allowed to "skip", but had to stay home and watch TV.
17. Did you have a job your senior year? Yes; I had been working at the DQ since I was a sophmore.
18. Where did you go most often for lunch? Nowhere; we weren't allowed to leave campus.
19. Have you gained weight since high school? I plead the fifth on this one.
20. What did you do after graduation? Went to Concord College with a group of so-called "friends". Turns out Anne from #1 was the only friend in the whole group.
21. What year did you graduate? 1984
22. Who was your Senior Prom Date? Steve
23. Are you going/did you go to your 10-year-reunion? Went to my 10 year and oh, the stories I could tell...like the girl who spent more time with her high school sweetheart than her current husband, went home to TX and filed for divorce, moved back to WV and married her sweetheart...didn't go to the 20 year...Anne from #1 got married two weeks before the reunion and I decided I'd have more fun at her wedding.

So there you have it...from then to now. So much more fun now, though...kids and all.

Which One?

Today was the first day of school in my county...yes, I know we started the day after Labor Day and had three recesses a day and still learned. But today was the first day students came back to class, and all day I was reminded of the sermon I heard at church on Sunday. A lay person who went on one of our mission trips delivered the sermon and it was all about how we are all put here to touch certain people, and will we or will we not know the people we are meant to come into contact with.

Now this is not my first year in the classroom; my first students are juniors in high school now and I don't know why this hasn't dawned me before. But when I stop and think about my job, the pressure is monmental. What if I never know the particular one I was meant to touch. What if I have a negative affect as opposed to a positive affect. I pray daily for guidance. I've always said I don't teach reading, writing and arithmatic; I teach children who need love, care and nurture...if they happen to learn reading, writing and arithmatic, good for them.

So here's to a great year; here's to love and learning; here's to love of learning. Check back in 179 days for a recap.